What Would You Do?
by TwilightTales
Summary: A short time before their wedding, Bella is in a car crash that causes her to lose her memory. Can Edward cling on to hope that she will remember him? And can he make the right decisions for the path ahead? ONE SHOT. EXB. EPOV. AH. A MUST READ! PLEASE REVIEW!


**Hey guys, a little one shot for you all... I don't own Twilight or the characters.**

**This story is based on the song "Say Something (I'm Giving Up On You)"**

**Please review when you finish reading, this story was slightly hard for me to put into words so I'd love to hear your feedback.**

* * *

Tell me... What would you do, if the love of your life suddenly disappeared?

Would you rather their eyes were cold, lifeless, and dead?

Or would you rather their eyes were warm, alive, but not recognising you at all?

You have five seconds to decide.

What would you do?

Go.

* * *

...

I didn't see her as she was right now.

I saw her as she was a year ago.

Alive, smart, beautiful, and madly in love with me.

Of course, she was still beautiful. Nothing could ever take Bella's good looks away.

And she was still alive.

To some degree anyway.

And she was smart, considering the amount of brain damage she'd encountered.

You see, my beautiful fiancée Isabella, had not been my beautiful fiancée for 374 days now. I counted each day like I was in prison.

Because I was serving a life sentence without her.

We'd known each other since we were children. We played in the sandpits at pre school. We shared lunch in middle school.

We exchanged kisses in high school.

Everyone knew I was in love with her. I was never the type of guy to hide my feelings. But luckily for me, Bella loved me too.

I thought I could see it in her eyes everyday when I picked her up for school. But hearing her say the words, feeling her lips brush against mine... Made all my dreams come true.

Her parents passed away in a car accident when she was just fifteen, and my mother and father decided to take her in.

She was essentially an orphan, and then suddenly she became my "sister" for all intents and purposes.

That does bad things to a guy. To be so in love with someone, and then feel weird about acting on it? It's like a kick in the balls.

Luckily for us though, we lived in Forks. And everyone knew Bella and I weren't brother and sister, and so, our relationship flourished.

By 18 I was proud to call her my girlfriend, and we moved to Seattle to go to College together.

I became a doctor.

She became a teacher.

At 25 I asked her to marry me.

I brought her to the restaurant by the docks, because it was her favourite.

I got her white roses, because they were her favourite.

I pre ordered cheesecake for dessert, because it was her favourite.

I got down on one knee, and I whispered how she meant everything to me. I told her she was the love of my life. And I swore I would cherish her, love her, and protect her, forever.

And she said yes.

We had a blissful year of wedding planning; laughing at each other's silly ideas, crying when we agreed on the venue, the song, the cake, the flowers... Kissing the life out of each other every time it hit us that we would be husband and wife...

And then, just like a click of my fingers... It was all gone.

_Say something, I'm giving up on you._

I could remember it like it was a minute ago... Getting the phone call from the hospital in Portland, telling me my fiancée had been in an accident. She'd put me down as her next of kin when she sliced her hand for the thousandth time cutting vegetables in our apartment. I'd gritted my teeth that day, hoping that the next of kin would never have to be used. Surely she couldn't be so clumsy as to do something that severe where I'd need to be called.

But this time she had.

_I'll be the one if you want me to._

Though it wasn't her fault in reality. All she'd been doing was driving to meet my mom for her last dress fitting before the big day. The other car had veered off his lane and into her side of the car. It tipped. Crashed. Crumbled.

And so did she.

Severe brain injuries.

I'd left work in Seattle, driving from one hospital to the other so fast I could've ended up in the bed next to hers.

Because that's what you do. When the love of your life needs you, you go. When there is a chance that you will never see their smile again, or their eyes, you fight and you pray and you tell God that you'll do anything... You'll lose a limb, you'll take the worst illness he has to throw at you, you'll bring ten years of bad luck upon yourself... Just don't take her away...

_Anywhere I, will follow you._

When I got there, I could barely see her under all the tubes and wires.

I could feel myself shaking, I could hear myself saying that I'd always protect her, and I knew I'd somehow found my way onto the floor.

Just like my promise, I was broken.

I listened to all the babble the doctors had to tell me, but I could see no light at the end of the tunnel.

There were two options;

1. She dies.

2. She lives, and she remembers very little about her life.

How was I supposed to hope for one of those options? The last thing I wanted was for Bella to die.

To see her body cold and lifeless... To watch her coffin be put into the ground. It was impossible for me to even think about.

But to have her open her eyes and ask who I was... To have her look at me with polite friendliness, and not the love I usually saw seeping from her pores... It would break my heart.

_And I, will stumble and fall._

It seems like there is an obvious solution.

You wish for them to live.

But thinking about the situation and actually being in it are two different things.

If you've ever felt love, you'll know that it doesn't come by every day. You'll know that when you find "the one" you never let them go. But how could it be possible for "the one" to still be on this earth, but not belong to you anymore?

Memories. History. Life.

All washed away in an instant.

But, I stood by my girl. I sat with her for four days as we waited to see if she'd wake up. I prayed that she would. I held her hands and tried to warm them up, trying to coax her back to life.

Because I'd accepted that I'd lost her, but at least I might be able to see her smile one last time. And I'd be able to look into her eyes and screenshot the image in my brain.

Bella did wake up after a week of being in hospital. When I felt her hand twitch in mine and her struggle for a breath against the tube in her throat, I pressed the buzzer automatically for the nurse.

They came in within seconds, helping her breathe and adjusting her monitors, reading for signs and results of tests that I didn't even want to think about.

All I could do was look at her. I stared, and I was so exhausted that my eyes couldn't even form tears.

A part of me hoped.

The doctor in me knew it was hopeless, but the Edward in me wished that she'd open her eyes and speak my name.

My breath stopped as her lids lifted and the doctors spoke to her quietly, assuring her that everything was going to be okay.

I knew then that I shouldn't have really hoped at all, because she was freaking out, glancing around the room like a deer caught in the headlights.

And then finally, her eyes rested on mine.

My heart leaped.

My girl. Those brown eyes that had looked into mine a million times, told me they loved me, cried with joy, smirked with seduction, smiled with happiness... They were staring right at me.

She was here. She was alive.

Bella's heart still beated, and for that I would be eternally grateful.

Our eyes had held and locked, and a second later they were gone.

She looked away from me like I was only another doctor in the room.

To her, I wasn't her fiancé. I wasn't her future husband. And I wasn't the love of her life.

She didn't know me.

_And I'm sorry I couldn't get to you._

I felt my world fall away from me that day, as if it hadn't done already.

Every fibre of my being had been attached to Bella before, and now she'd cut the strings. I was lost. I was without the one person I needed.

What was I supposed to do with my life? I had a mother, a father, a house, a job... And what did that mean?

It meant nothing without Bella.

People take things for granted, specifically people that could be gone in a second, and I cursed myself for not telling her I loved her every second of every day. I'd told her I loved her a million and one times, but it wasn't enough.

It's never enough.

That day, as they calmed Bella down and told her about the accident, my father had almost picked me up and carried me from her room. He told me I had to be strong. He told me I had to decide if I was going to tell Bella or not.

As if there was any other option?

Was I suppose to help her get back to health and then let her go off and get married to some other asshole?

But Carlisle explained that things would have to be done slowly, and over the next few days I brought his plan into action.

I talked to Bella's doctors and got her placed in a home hospital, where she would be cared for by the medical profession, and also me. I had a room at the hospital, just down the corridor from Bella's.

I would act as her doctor, but in reality I would sit and talk to her everyday to try and get her memory back.

I know, it sounds stupid. But it was better than rushing in there and telling her I was her future husband.

At least if I could sit with her, be with her... Then I'd get to spend time with my girl, and she'd hopefully regain some brain functions.

It started off slowly. At first, I just caught her up on current affairs as I pretended to check her charts. Then I got more courageous, I touched her arm to check her pulse. I got her to squeeze my hand to test her strength.

I even got to give her a hug one night before she went to sleep.

_And anywhere I, would've followed you._

Do you have any idea what it's like to be around the one you love, and they have no idea?

Bella and I have a million memories, and yet she remembers none of them. It's like being on the outside of a book, wanting to get in.

I watched her everyday, smiling at how her bottom lip jutted out a little further than the top one. I watched as she licked her lips before eating her dinner. I watched as she crinkled her nose whilst reading a book I'd brought her.

I had a lot to be thankful for. I got to listen to her laugh, I got to see her smile and look at me with those big brown eyes.

But I always wished for more.

I wanted her to know me, to recognise me. I spent my nights dreaming about the feel of her hair against my finger tips, brushing it away from her face as I kissed her lips softly. I dreamt of her telling me she loved me, and how she'd giggle every morning when I picked her up and spun her around whilst she made breakfast. I wanted to go back to our house and find her curled up on the sofa with a book in her hands, pizza on her lap, and a soppy movie on in the background.

And the more I thought about it all, the more I cried.

And the angrier I got.

Why me?

Why did this have to happen to Bella?

I'd done everything right in my life. I worked hard at school, I helped save lives for a living, I loved the most beautiful woman that had ever walked the planet, and yet I had nothing at all to show for it.

A year after her accident and I was still trying to coax her into remembering me, and she was getting worse.

I'd spoken to the doctors just yesterday, and they explained that Bella's memory and brain functions had been declining. When I asked what that meant they said that there was a possibility she might just fall asleep one night and her brain might not be able to wake her up.

I cried myself to sleep.

I wondered if I'd get a knock on my door the next day telling me she was gone.

How could I live on this planet without her? How could I breathe without the air she supplied me with? Bella was "it" for me, she was the one I was suppose to spend my life with, be with until we were old and grey, watching our grandkids run around our back yard.

I never got to marry her. I never got to hear her say "I do".

I never got to have babies with her, and watch her as she cradled our little boy or girl in her arms as they slept.

I never got to make our dreams come true. And I'd promised her that I would.

I couldn't even remember the last time she told me she loved me. I knew, in the back of my mind, it was the morning of the accident, just before I'd gone to work.

We never left each other's sights without saying "I love you".

But that had been over a year ago.

And I ached to hear her say it again.

Today, the doctors told me something interesting. Something that has me sitting in my room wondering which option I would choose.

Bella is deteriorating. Her brain is slowing down and eventually she will die.

It was certain now.

Bella was going to leave me.

I felt like a coward for being angry about the past year.

It was a year I got to spend with her.

And I wouldn't have any more.

It could be a month, a week, a day... But she would leave me.

And the doctor told me there were two options;

1. She passes away peacefully in her sleep.

2. Clarity before death.

The second is seen in quite a few patients before they die. Cancer patients I have treated have had a sudden burst of life just an hour before they slip into death. It's a common occurrence for doctors to see. And apparently, according to Bella's doctors who specialise in neuroscience, it can happen with patients that have illnesses such as dementia, and also those that have brain damage. This would mean that just for a moment, just before Bella dies, she would know me.

She would look at me with recognition and love. She might even be able to tell me she loves me.

However, because of the extent of Bella's illnesses, it would cause her great pain.

She might not even be able to speak to me through the feelings coursing through her head and body.

But she'd be able to look at me... I'd be able to see MY Bella again...

Isn't that enough?

Could I be that selfish?

Could I risk Bella's pain and suffering just to have one more moment in my life where she loved me? Before she left me for good?

Would you?

I hung my head in my hands as tears rolled down my cheeks. Of course I couldn't.

_And I, will swallow my pride._

I wouldn't ever make my Bella be in pain, simply for me to see her one last time.

Most people didn't get this option.

Most people get a phonecall explaining a loved one has died. At least I got a year, even though she had no clue who I was.

And I had my memories, right? I had all those years with her, loving her, and that would have to be my comfort after she was gone.

I left my room with a heavy heart, my brain already deciding what my heart didn't want to believe.

She had to die peacefully. In her sleep.

She couldn't go through any pain, just for me.

Opening the door to her room, I made my way inside quietly. She was used to me checking up on her by now, but this time she was asleep, her head resting against the pillow gently as her chest rose and fell with every breath.

She was still breathing.

I sat down in the chair beside her, and something in back of my mind told me that this was it.

This time I had to say goodbye.

_You're the one that I love._

I reached for her hand slowly, my breathing already coming in gasps as tears rolled down my cheeks.

Her hand fitted into mine perfectly. Just like always.

"Bella..." I whispered softly, "Bella I love you." I shut my eyes, shaking my head for a long moment, "I don't want you to leave me, I don't want to let you go. We always promised we'd be there for each other... And what am I supposed to do without you? I have nothing Bella... You held me together... And I want nothing more than to see you look at me again and tell me you love me." The air around me felt tense, as if in any second her breathing would stop and she'd be gone from me forever.

I was running out of time.

"I want you to go peacefully, Bella. I've been selfish and had you here for a year... But now I have to do what's right for you... I have to let you go." I raised her hand to my face, letting her soft skin touch my cheek gently, "Go Bella."

The words burnt coming out of my mouth, "Please just go... I don't want you to be in pain... I want you to go to a place where we're together... Where I'll be able to hold you, and kiss you and tell you I love you. I want you to die so you can find me again. Because I know that, once you go... You'll remember me. You'll remember us. And it's the only comfort I have right now..." I hung my head, taking one last look at her face before I shut my eyes, "Go, Bella. Please."

_And I'm saying goodbye._

I sat like that for about fifteen minutes, listening as her breathing became slower and slower.

I let go of her hand gently, placing it back on the bed as I moved to sit on the mattress.

Moving my hand over her heart, I felt the gentle thumping as I shut my eyes again, reliving our memories in the solstice of my own head.

Suddenly, roughly, I felt a warm hand grip my wrist and my eyes shot open in shock as the body on the bed gasped for a breath.

My first instinct was to get off the bed and explain professionally that I was just checking for her heartbeat... But as my wide eyes glanced at her face, I stared into her eyes.

And I wasn't her doctor anymore... I was-

"_Edward_!" She cried out automatically, squeezing my wrist as tears spilled over onto her cheeks.

_Say something, I'm giving up on you._

I blinked, my heart stalling in my chest as I sucked in a breath, "_Bella_?"

We only looked at each other for a short moment, but in that moment I saw her brown eyes shining with that familiar burst of love.

She knew me.

She was here.

She was home.

I grabbed her suddenly, pulling her against my chest as she yanked at me, crushing her chest to mine as her head found a home in my neck. She breathed me in and I found myself running my hands through her hair, smelling her familiar scent as I hushed her quiet sobs.

She was back.

For the last year I thought I'd never see her again. And here she was, holding me, knowing me, and loving me.

I realised that her body was shaking, and I knew that it wasn't just because of her tears.

She was in pain.

I pulled away from her slightly, stroking her cheek and placing my forehead to hers.

"What... I don't understand..."

"I'm so sorry, Edward." She whispered, her lips shaking with agony, her hands were frantic on my shoulders, and she couldn't stop them from moving.

I held her face in my hands, "You have nothing to be sorry for, Bella."

_Anywhere I, would've followed you._

"I don't want to leave." She shook her head, a stream of tears falling down her face, "I want to stay here with you. I want to marry you and have babies, remember?"

I nodded my head, "I remember, baby."

I could hear myself in my own head, begging God to let her stay.

She knew me. Clearly her brain was okay now. She could get better and be alive.

She didn't have to die.

But I was a doctor, and I knew this was just the good before the bad. She was better before she became worse.

Fatally worse.

And I had to accept it and enjoy my last few moments with her.

"I don't want to let you go, Bella... But it's going to be okay."

"I'm scared." She whispered, her teeth gritting as her eyes shut quickly and she whimpered quietly.

"Don't be... I'll be right here... I promise."

"Will you always remember me?" She asked softly, her eyes opening again to stare at me.

"Always." I swore, "ALWAYS."

She reached up with shaking fingers, and I revelled in the feeling of her touch as she ran a trail along my forehead, down my nose, across my lips, finally stopping at my cheek.

I couldn't quite believe that this was happening. To go from being in love with each other, to her "almost death", to her not knowing me at all, and now... She knew me again, just for a little while... Just before she left for good...

It was like a little goodbye.

It was one last comforting message.

"You have to know, Edward... You're the best thing that ever happened to me... And I know it's fate that I have to leave... But I loved you since the day I met you, all the way back when we were three years old. I loved you everyday, and you're the most kind, caring, handsome, smart, loving man that I could've ever had the pleasure of knowing." She reached forward a little, and softly placed her lips to mine, kissing me gently, "I love you, Edward Cullen. And in my own head, we got married and had babies and had the best life ever."

I stared at her, hating myself for crying because I knew it was just upsetting her more.

I'd been imagining having her back for the past year, and now I could barely speak.

But I forced myself.

"Miss Bella Swan, do you take me, Edward Cullen, to be your husband... For better or worse, in sickness and in health," I stuttered quietly, "As long as we both shall live?"

She nodded her head with a teary smile, running her shaking fingers through my hair as she struggled for a breath, "I do."

My eyes closed at the sound of those words. The words I'd longed to hear for so long.

Through her agony, she managed to return the question to me, and I nodded automatically, "I do. Always."

I hugged her tight, placing a kiss on her forehead as I watched her eyes droop a little, "I haven't got much time left." She murmured, "I can feel it."

I didn't say a word, instead I moved us around in the bed, cradling her against my chest, thankful that I got to hold her one last time.

She sighed against me, placing her head over my heart, smiling to herself gently.

"Bella?" I called her softly, and she looked up at me with an achingly slow pace, "Are you in much pain?"

I could feel her shaking in my arms, and I could hear the struggle for her breath, but she just smiled, "I can tell you feel guilty for this..." I nodded my head in confirmation, "Don't... I would go through all this pain a million times, just to get to do this one last time."

I stroked her cheek gently, leaning down to kiss her, "I love you Mrs Cullen."

She smiled against my lips, her breath coming in a shallow puff, "I love you too. Always."

_Say something, I'm giving up on you..._

"Wait for me." I told her, "You better wait for me."

"I'll be the one in the wedding dress." She giggled.

I laughed despite myself, watching as her eyes drooped closed and her body gradually became limp in my arms. Her chest rose and fell, the interval between each breath becoming longer.

_Say something..._

"I love you, Edward." She whispered suddenly.

"I love you too, Bella," I whispered back to her, just as she let out her last breath.

I could tell she was gone within seconds, and I crushed my face into her hair as I finally let out the real tears I'd been holding in.

I was shaking, causing her body to bob in my arms as guilt racked my bones.

I know she'd told me not to feel guilty, but I did.

Because I was so irrevocably happy that she'd come back to me, just for a short few minutes... And she'd put herself through pain to do so.

Should I feel guilty?

Should I be happy I got to tell her I love her?

Should I be grateful that she finally said "i do" and I got to kiss her one last time?

I played her "I love you" on repeat in my mind as I gazed down at her body, planting one last kiss on her lips.

* * *

Tell me... What would you do, if the love of your life suddenly reappeared?

Would you rather they felt a million shards of pain, but they got to declare their love and you got to hold them in your arms one last time?

Or you would rather they fell asleep peacefully, with no pain, to never wake up again.

You have five seconds to decide.

What would you do?

Go.


End file.
